Take your top off and finally be as comfortable as he is. — I was at a public beach far out in Brooklyn with a guy I was seeing and some of his friends when four breasts came out. Two of his female friends took off their tops and ran into the water with only a bikini bottom on. …

It’s not all about his junk — When we’re in bed, it turns me on like crazy to talk about his penis. About how much I crave it. About what I want to do with it. I love feeling like a naughty girl, who wants nothing more than to go down on him. But I can’t say…

Does she want it or is she just going along? — How do you get someone’s real full-bodied consent? In the context of sex, consent must adhere to the FRIES acronym. True consent is always Freely given, Reversible, Informed, Enthusiastic, and Specific. But I know as well as anyway one else, that it’s not always so easy to get this right. …

You got this. — I want more confidence during sex. You’d be hard-pressed to find someone in the world who didn’t share this wish. But how? How do you get more confidence in the bedroom? Well the most straightforward way, of course, is to simply have more sex. The more you do anything in…

Even though I get jealous sometimes… — I got into non-monogamy for the same reason everyone assumes people want to get into non-monogamy: I wanted to have my cake and eat it too. I wanted to be in a committed relationship yet still ethically and openly connect romantically with other men. I wanted to enjoy the love…

When sex becomes political — There’s this thing you may have heard of. It’s called the orgasm gap. Basically, researchers have found that women in heterosexual relationships orgasm less reliably than anyone else. Less than heterosexual men, less than gay men, and yes — in case you thought this simply had to do with women…

Because you can have whatever you want. — It was about four am on the morning of my 28th birthday. The music had just turned off, but the Brooklyn bar/club was still packed with people chatting, not wanting to let go of the night. I saw a lot of familiar faces in the crowd. My Burning Man camp…

Confessions of a pillow princess — “I want you inside me,” I said with my hand on his penis, where it had been for the past 30 seconds. “Okay…” he said, but I could see the disappointment in his eyes. “What’s wrong?” I asked. Now he seemed downright exasperated. “I feel — just — like we…